It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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