rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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