soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
