Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
