My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
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