If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I think I just sharted jello shots
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
