Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
