i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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