if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I think my moral compass just broke
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
