Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize