This dress was meant to end up on your floor
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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