i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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