Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
