In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
