Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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