Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
