do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
he just fucked me for my cheese.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize