Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I need a burrito and a hug.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
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