Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
