Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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