i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize