so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
