She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize
