I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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