Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
