That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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