Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
