Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
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