Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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