if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
