She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
