he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
