You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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