She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
All the doctor said was why
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize