So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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