I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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