I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Randomize
