Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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