people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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