eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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