we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
