Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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