I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
