at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize