check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
