I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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