I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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