And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize