its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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