How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
